Here are three profound lessons that can help your family.
1. Learn how to slow down.
A good place to start is by helping your child to create daily routines and possibly even use checklists for completing tasks. Also, making sure that his/her leisure time involves a variety of activities, such as sports, board games and time away from technology.
Mindfulness can be an extremely helpful practice to develop. The intention with mindfulness is about learning to be present and experiencing life as it is happening. This helps to stop our senses from becoming overwhelmed by the fast pace of our intense lives.
Through the process of learning to slow down, children find life can be more satisfying, enjoyable, and even less stressful.
Children with ADHD experience life as though everything is happening at 2x speed. They take in much more than other people and they can feel overwhelmed easily.
The vast majority of kids with ADHD can also be considered highly sensitive people. Their sensitivity to the world can be too much at times. The way some teens with ADHD manage this sensitivity is by learning to focus on something they love, like video games.
Depending on what they focus on, this can be helpful or harmful, especially if they are avoiding personal responsibility.
This situation may be complicated by the fact that your teenager probably craves intensity and excitement in his life!
It is important for you guys to . . .
- Learn how to slow down
- Experience healthy intensity through honest, interpersonal interactions
- Be responsible and accountable for his/her actions
- Work to accomplish his/her personal goals making him/her realize the importance of it
- Dont be ashamed of his/her acts
- Develop a sense of pride from things he/she has accomplished and celebrate every moment.
2. Life doesn’t always feel good, but your child CAN handle it.
In today’s society, our children are often given the message that there is a cure for pain. This is true sometimes, but it is important to be able to deal with discomfort. Often, teens with ADHD have a tough time handling frustration, pain, discomfort. Some of this comes from a belief that nothing should hurt. The reality is that sometimes life is painful and this has to be explained to them softly, slowly, having 100% patience and in the way/pattern that he/she understands.
Children with ADHD need to learn to cope with stress, calm themselves down, find distraction when necessary and heal from the emotional pain that is a part of life. Join ICPN Mumbai classes on handling these type of children. Help your kids and also the ones who need your expertise.
That is a tall order for sure, but the good news is that your child has a supportive parent like you!
3. You can support your child without solving all his/her problems.
As a parent of a child with ADHD, I can tell you that it often feels like things are hard enough for my son simply because he has ADHD. It is tempting to rescue him from his suffering and solve many of his problems. I have certainly been guilty of that at times (Arrgh!).
Your teenager will learn best when he knows you trust he is capable, that you believe in him and you will help him to accomplish his goals. Learning to tolerate my child’s suffering has been one of the most difficult things I have experienced.
ADHD is a collection of symptoms and symptoms are a form of suffering. Your child needs to be supported to manage his symptoms so he can adapt to the world in healthy ways. The world won’t adapt to him/her and it won’t help if he/she expects this to happen.
The good news is that people with ADHD tend to have higher IQs than the general population. For this reason and many others, your child can absolutely learn how to manage his symptoms. Thus dont worry…dont hurry…